Commissioned work always available - contact me for details.
FAQ
Why is this site called "turtlekiss.com?" I originally started this site in 2003 to raise awareness for turtle rescue and expose the awful truth about the pet trade. It's gradually evolved into a hub with multiple functions - it's the photo host for my auctions, a showcase of my creations, Koopa's art archive, and one of the internet's most thorough compilations of educational, informative, and fun turtle links. Even though this site is very much about my art I still want to provide plenty of resources for anyone in search of turtle-related information. I'm also cursed with a name that gets spelled wrong constantly, so I figured "turtlekiss" would be much easier to remember. I use the TurtleKiss handle on Facebook, WordPress, YouTube, Xbox Live and PS3. My eBay ID is slightly different - TurtleKissDesigns. And yes, I know that some turtles carry and transmit salmonella. Koopa apparently does not, because I've kissed his beak countless times.
Do you offer commissioned work? Absolutely! I'd love to create personalized artwork for you, based on your color preferences and the size of your wall space. I'll attempt anything from abstract portraits to 6 foot long breast paintings. Email me! Why don't you share photos from the breast painting process?
I'm not willing to destroy my reputation as a professional artist because you understandably want topless photos of me. If you're having trouble finding nude photos on the internet, you may need to disable the parental controls on your computer.
What makes your breast paintings so special? I'm the first internet-based artist to treat breast painting as a fine art instead of a novelty, fetish, fundraiser, or publicity scheme. All of my paintings are archived, documented, preserved to last & highly collectible. Please consider the importance of supporting artists with original ideas, words, and concepts - having your intellectual property stolen is not fun!
Do you offer Layaway? Absolutely! Layaway is available on all paintings with a sale price of $100 or more - this includes commissions.
Layaway is a purchase plan designed for clients who want to buy merchandise without using credit or paying the full price immediately. The merchandise is shipped once the total amount is paid in full.
My layaway plan is pretty standard. I will hold your artwork for a maximum of 60 DAYS, by which time it should be paid in full. There's no penalty for completing your layaway plan early.
An initial non-refundable 25% downpayment is required within 3 days after the purchase date. Your order may be cancelled if you cannot make the first payment on time. All subsequent payments can be made in as many installments as you want, anytime within the next 60 days. I may be willing to extend the length of the plan on higher-priced merchandise - just ask!
the fine print:
If a payment hasn't been made for 30 days, a cordial reminder email will be sent to the buyer. If the balance hasn't been paid off in full by the due date, a deadline notice will be sent to the buyer. If the remaining balance is not received within 5 days from the deadline notice, the layaway purchase will become void. The non-refundable downpayment of 25% of the purchase amount will be forfeited. All payments made (minus the non-refundable downpayment) will be refunded back to the buyer within 72 hours. The same applies to canceled layaway plans.
What are your payment options?
PayPal (credit card, checking account or e-Check)
Postal Money Orders (US) & International Money Orders
What do I need to do to buy & put an item on layaway?
First, please email me with the item number/title, and let me know you're interested in an installment plan.
If we both agree to the terms, I'll send you an invoice for the initial payment, which will also include item number/description, the remaining balance, and the due date for payment in full. The downpayment must be received within 3 days. If no payment is made, I reserve the right to cancel the transaction. Your item will be shipped within 48 business hours after your LAST payment has been processed
How are your paintings shipped? Stretched & ready to hang with documentation included. Everything larger than an ACEO is sealed in a waterproof bag, then
carefully packed with recycled newspaper and cardboard. I ship via USPS Priority Mail to anywhere in the US. ACEOs are shipped First Class for free.
Do you ship internationally?
Yes. Please note that some paintings will be
too large to ship overseas so please inquire about
shipping costs before bidding. All
paintings shipped internationally will travel via USPS Priority Mail International.
What is your return policy? I generally don't offer refunds on art unless the artwork is somehow misrepresented. I can't be held responsible if you don't thoroughly read my description. Packaging and shipping paintings can get quite expensive, so please ask any questions and view the
photos and details carefully before buying or bidding. Most buyers
report that the paintings look much nicer in person. Can I use one of your paintings on my web page?
Sure, but please link back and let me know. I might give your site a thank-you plug on my blog.
How long will it take for me to get
my order? Auction/store items will be shipped from
Connecticut within 72 hours of purchase. It will usually take anywhere from 2-7
business days to receive your order within the US. Books and gift items purchased through retailers supported on this site
(such as Amazon) will have their own shipping estimates.
Which charities do you support? I regularly donate my art to fundraisers sponsored by various registered 401(k) charities. These paintings make great raffle or silent auction prizes! If you have an event coming up, I'd be happy to consider providing an artwork donation. I require a minimum of 4 months notice (more is better,) and my monthly painting donation limit is currently set at 2 - first come, first served. It obviously needs to be a cause I support, so it might help you to know that I'm anti-war, omnivorous, libertarian, athiest, and a Red Sox/Mariners fan. I won't support any political, government, military, church or NY Yankee-related cause. Me and Koopa are proud to have been able to donate over $12,000 to
turtle rescue. I also support breast cancer research, equal rights, autism awareness, domestic violence prevention, public-funded animal shelters, mental health, the rebuilding of New Orleans, and the CT Children's Medical Center.
What kind of turtle is Koopa? He's a gulf coast box turtle, the largest of
the American box turtles.
Is painting safe for Koopa?
Koopa safely created
827 original paintings
over the course of his 5 year career. I have never put
Koopa in a dangerous situation. I'm a well-informed, educated turtle
owner and I'm certain that Koopa was never subject to any harm or stress while painting.
Koopa is fully
trusting of me & he's been acclimated to being rinsed off in the shower. Precautions were taken to make sure he didn't prolapse in
the paint. I consulted Koopa's vet. I researched paint via MSDS (Material Safety Data Sheets) and verified that individual ingredients were non-toxic & US-made. I spot-tested each color of every brand for a reaction, and did months of dry runs
before actually using any paint. Prior to that, I raised Koopa in a completely tank-free environment & gave him years of
special attention/eye contact to the point where we developed a very
special and unique relationship. Watch the video below if you are skeptical - there is nothing about the process that I have ever had second
thoughts about.
HOWEVER...
I won't help you paint with your turtle or offer related advice under any circumstances. What was safe for Koopa is not safe for your turtle, especially if you don't do the necessary research and take the time to develop a trusting relationship. The actions of a frightened turtle could easily lead to respiratory infections, blindness,
and even death. I strongly urge you not to take that risk.
Has Koopa received any publicity?
Oh yeah! Koopa has appeared in newspapers and magazines, on local, national, and
international TV, radio, and countless websites.
.
He's also landed the front page of the UK Metro and appeared in 2 Ripley's Believe it or Not! books.
Does Koopa do commissioned work? As of April 2008 Koopa is retired and that is not likely to change.
Are any of Koopa's paintings available?
Possibly. I've kept several of Koopa's best pieces in my private collection, and I may decide to part with 1 or 2 of them in the future. Just a warning - these pieces are worth way more to me than you might expect.
Misc.
Koopa is 30+ years old and was
originally taken from the wild, which is why a chunk of his shell is missing in
the front (likely a wild animal attack). He has no shell rot. His 2
former owners did not give him a proper diet or UV lighting, and his claws grew
very long and crooked. He received improper care for at least 15 years before I brought him home. He is not a candidate to be returned to
the wild.
I occasionally get emails from people who tell
me to trim Koopa's beak. It's been trimmed by his vet several times and it always looks
pretty much the same. It doesn't
impair the way he eats, and his vet says it's
fine. I can certainly appreciate
any legitimate "concerns" about turtles, but Koopa
receives the best care possible and he is very happy.
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